The Starbucks Algorithm

An algorithm is a finite sequence of instructions, an explicit, step-by-step procedure for solving a problem. – Wikipedia
Having moved to the Seattle area a little over a month ago from Boston, I never really understood why people were so enamored with a cup of coffee that had a semi-naked mermaid emblazoned on the side. In Boston, Starbucks locations weren’t on every corner but you weren’t too far from one if you were in your car and needed a caffeine fix. Seattle is a completely different story. 
As the saying goes, “When in Rome…” (you know the rest), so I ventured into my local Starbucks less than a block away from the apartment. Picking something that seemed innocuous at the time, I ordered a Grande Chai Latte. That was 2 weeks ago. According to the Starbucks website, their Chai Lattes are “A spicy drink of black tea infused with cardamom, cinnamon, black pepper and star anise added to freshly steamed milk.” 
Little did I know that underneath the frothy, milky heaven of foam there would be a wicked concoction that would keep me awake at night thinking about its spicy goodness…yearning for the hours to fly by quickly so I could roll out of bed and get to my local Starbucks. In the back of my head I’m thinking that there has to be a 12-step program to help me with my new-found addiction. Sometimes I would stop into a Starbucks 3 times a day to pick up my favorite elixir. Just passing a Starbucks would make my tongue tingle as the round mermaid logo would invite me in as if she were saying, “Drink me.” Some people would say that Starbucks is evil and corporate. I like to look at the coffee cup half-full…Starbucks is crafty and smart!
Having gone through the “I just had the last sip of my latte, where am I going to get my next fix!” experience too many times I care to mention publicly, I happened on the Starbucks Algorithm. Quite frankly, there’s no science or proof that such a thing exists but in my own meanderings. For all I know there could be a Top Secret group of baristas at Starbucks HQ walking around in green lab coats and pocket protectors figuring out where the next store opening will be. I find it a strange coincidence that just when I am about to finish my latte and the “Oh snap, I’m almost done” panic attack is about to kick in, there’s a Starbucks within a 1 or 2 block radius from where I may be standing. It’s as if the Starbucks mermaid keeps following me around asking me if I would like a refill…and you know what? Don’t mind if I do!
Update: Checked the Starbucks website…there are 102 Starbucks in a 5-mile radius from where I live. 102!

When you visit, here’s what you’ll be doing…

Now that we’ve officially moved to The Emerald City, people are going to be visiting from far and wide. As with any visitors that arrive at SEA-TAC, there’s a list of “staples” where to take people on their inaugural trip out. Here’s what we have so far:

  1. The Space Needle – Something that can be seen from every shot that’s taken of the Seattle skyline. Seeing as we’ve already done it, we’ll wait for you in the gift shop downstairs. BTW, if you upgrade to the “2 Visits in 24 Hours pass”, you can make that second trip yourself, the gift shop is not THAT interesting. If you decide to grab a bite to eat, bring us along! Always wanted to know what a $37 sandwich would taste like.
  2. Monorail – Who would have thought that having a monorail with Point A and Point B as the entire journey would be a good idea. Seattle did. You know you’re not a tourist when you take the monorail to actually commute from Seattle Center to Westlake Center. Yes, you could walk it, but when it rains, the monorail is a nice dry option. Also, sit up front if there’s no kids crying that you took their spot.
  3. Experience Music Project & Science Fiction Museum – Some call it an eyesore, others think it’s a cathedral to past musicians that were able to transform 8 notes or the same 3 chords into works of art. It’s one of those things that you need to do when you come to Seattle to say that you’ve done it. Now, it’s no Rock & Roll Hall of Fame and Museum (thanks Cleveland!), however, it’s still pretty neat to walk through just to see it from the inside. Skip the iPod tour, it seemed like a good idea at the time, but the interface can be a little confusing at times and it doesn’t tell you much more than you can read on the little placards in the exhibits.
  4. Westlake Center et al. – The heart of shopping in Seattle. Complete with bubble tea, Starbucks (not the original) and if you’re lucky…the occasional protest (sometimes it’s against the Macy’s across the street, sometimes it’s about Gaza, you never know).
  5. Pike Place Market – This is where the original Starbucks is (see #4). You’ll recognize it by the insanely long line and music coming from across the street. Pike Place Market is also home of Pike Place Fish Market, the very place where they throw the fish. Again, look for the huge crowd with only the locals buying fish. Rachel The Pig is nearby too. Good luck snapping a pic…it’s very popular with parents plopping their kids on top of her and coaxing them with candy to smile. One of the nice things about The Market is the fresh flowers in the summertime. You’ll be able to find flowers in colors not normally found in nature. There’s also a bunch of local merchants peddling their wares and most of the food vendors offer free samples. Also of note…the place with the little donuts (long line and sugar in the air) and a couple of stalls down is the hot dog joint with fresh-dipped corn dogs.
  6. The Ducks – Something that every major city has, well maybe not the ones that are landlocked (sorry Branson, Missouri). Haven’t done these yet, but it’s on the list, because they are the ugliest things on the road and there are some good pic snapping opportunities.
  7. The Taphouse Grill – I can’t think of what’s more impressive…the halibut sandwich (ask for it without cheese) or the 140 beers on tap. I’ll go with the fish on this one. Not that I have anything against a selection of beers that requires its own menu, it’s just that the fish was REALLY good.
  8. Easy Street Records – They have a couple of locations in the Seattle area. You never know who you could bump into when shopping at Easy Street. Some of the CDs are as low as 99 cents. Trust me, they’re crap. Go there either if you want to pick something up or just to browse. In case you were wondering, there are other people than Jimi Hendrix, Pearl Jam, and Soundgarden that came out of Seattle.
  9. Fred Meyer – Has to be one of the neatest stores that we’ve visited so far. Where else can you pick up a bag of frozen peas, a Seattle Sounders FC hoodie, and a chrysanthemum?
  10. Mt. Rainier – It’s a 3 hour drive from Seattle. Buy a postcard or take a picture.
  11. REI – The flagship store is located just off of I-5…and it is a wonder to behold. You can go in there and not know what half the stuff does, but there’s something about it that makes you think that you can traverse their climbing wall. Hell, Franklin D. Roosevelt would be inspired to go snow shoeing after a trip to REI!
  12. Seattle Public Library – You don’t need to be a card-carrying member walk through the doors. But stand outside it for a minute or two to take it in. OK, enough standing outside, go inside and take a look. First thing you’ll notice entering on the 4th Ave side is the book return. Watch the 4:30 minute video in the corner. Fascinating. It really is. Take the escalators to the other floors and just walk around. Be sure to stop at the shop on the 3rd floor, there’s a bunch of neat things if you’re looking for something to take back home that isn’t a salmon on dry ice.
  13. Qwest Field – If you’re lucky enough to be here when a game is on, try and grab some tickets. Especially in the summertime when the weather is nice and it’s a night game…can’t beat it. Tickets are cheap, concessions not so much, but it’s a great night out.
  14. Dick’s (on Capitol Hill) – It’s bad luck to have 13 items on a list, so here’s a freebie. Dick’s is an institution. The burgers are cheap (couple bucks each), shakes are good, and the fries are cut fresh. That being said, make sure there’s a bathroom nearby as your meal will run through you faster than a Japanese Bullet Train.
  15. Uwajimaya –  Known to locals as Uwajimaya, this Asian market is huge. If you’re looking for a Red Bull, freeze-dried squid, and a Beard Papa cream puff…this is the place you want to be!
Seattle is filled with stuff to do…from walking the piers, to walking downtown, to walking to the Science Center (are you getting my drift). You don’t need to rent a car here, besides if you stay longer than a week, you’ll need to get a second mortgage for the parking. There’s lots of great restaurants, haven’t encountered any bad ones yet but I have my suspicions. I’m sure that I’m forgetting things like Pioneer Square, the Utilikilt store, and The Underground Tour. I’ll leave that for the next list.

Searching for Uncle Joe

To Mom & Dad:

 
In preparation for your trip to The Emerald City, we thought we would make your stay more amenable with the above-shown bottle of Tio Pepe. Now, that being said, your attempts to thwart our pursuit for this supposedly banned / non-imported beverage have been foiled. Whilst walking around Seattle this afternoon we happened upon an Italian grocery store in Pike Place Market. Did they have it? No. But they did have some nice things, nothing that we decided to buy, but nice nonetheless. However, the tale doesn’t end here…they did tell us that we should go to The Spanish Table down the street to see if they had it. 
 
Arriving at The Spanish Table we asked to be pointed in the direction of their sherries. We were shown over to “The Wall of Sherry”. Glancing around the different bottles and labels we couldn’t find it until the Hallelujah Chorus from Handel’s Messiah shone a light on the bottle we thought we were looking for. There in all of it’s glory was a $25 bottle of Tio Pepe (yes, the very bottle you claim to not be in existence). Then we thought about this alcoholic “Holy Grail” and decided that it was too much to spend…besides, it was Kosher for Passover (really, it was!). Noticing that there was a cheaper bottle next to it (cue Hallelujah Chorus), and the same size, we were about to pick that bottle up…but my arm started to feel heavy as I lunged forward to grab the $18 bottle of Tio Pepe. It was as if a higher power (my wallet) was stopping me from becoming one with the elixir. All of a sudden I found myself reaching for the $10 bottle of Tio Pepe and as I wrapped my nimble fingers around its neck, I heard a sigh coming from my left pocket. 
 
It now sits in our fridge waiting for your arrival. 
 
Love, 
 
Tim & Jamie
 
P.S. We’re starting a tab on your visit and you’re already at $10
P.P.S. If Bram & Lou come before you and drink the Tio Pepe, you still owe us the $10

Ah, the city life!

So, it has been 2 weeks since we first arrived in our new city. In those two weeks, since we are currently sans jobs, we have had the opportunity to explore Seattle and what it has to offer. Well we really haven’t hit the tip of the iceberg, but we have found a few things that we enjoy.

On the first Saturday we were here we walked over to the international fountain at Seattle Center. This fountain is set to music, kind of like the fountains at the Bellagio in Vegas. But this fountain allows people to play in it. It was quite busy today as it was a beautiful sunny day (see above picture).

 

Not far from the international fountain you can find our new favorite local record shop Easy Street Records. They don’t have Wicked Cheep Cd’s but, they do have $.99 Cd’s, You can’t beat that. The bad thing though is that they have a card they mark off when you buy Cd’s. If you buy enough you get a free CD. That’s just what we need, an excuse to buy more Cd’s!

One thing we found that just seemed completely baffling was the book vending machine.
Yes, the top 3 rows are books while the bottom 2 rows are healthy snacks. Who knew?

Now, moving on the the not so good for you snacks we are fond of, starting with the Top Pot Doughnut shop. I highly recommend the apple fritter, while Tim is more an old fashion glazed kinda guy. Honestly, I don’t think they could make anything taste bad here. We haven’t tried every kind of donut they have, but living only a block away, it will happen. Oh, yes it will!

Ok, so right about now you are thinking to yourself “Wow, one block from those delicious donuts, boy do they have it made.” But wait there’s more…
We found out today there is a cupcake store going into one of the storefronts on the first floor of our apartment building. The yellow leaf cupcake co. will be opening this spring. That means if I need a yummy treat, I just have to walk downstairs. Very dangerous!

With all this scrumptiousness so close to us you may be asking yourself “But Jamie and Tim how will you stay so fit and trim?” That’s easy, we walk everywhere. Not only is it good for the environment, it’s good for us. We’ve been averaging 3 miles a day. We took a walk along the waterfront the other evening at sunset. We passed the “good neighborhood,” with the fancy apartments on the water and walked a total of 5 miles.

This has been a great two weeks and we look forward to more exploration and sharing our finds.

Seattle’s newest citizens,

Jamie & Tim

The Playlist

Drove 3,100+ miles across the country and here’s what we listened to on the iPod…Starting with the most recent tunes first:

The Old Apartment – Barenaked Ladies
Dirty Day – U2
Cecilia – Simon & Garfunkel
Butterflies & Hurricanes – Muse
Because I Got High – Afroman
Breaking The Girl – Red Hot Chili Peppers
U Can’t Touch This – MC Hammer
Belive In Magic – The Lovin’ Spoonful
Perfect – Alanis Morissette
Hungry Like The Wolf – Duran Duran
The Winner Takes It All – ABBA
Little Red Corvette – Prince
Mystify – INXS
Where The Streets Have No Name – U2
Chasing Cars – Snow Patrol
Knocked Out – Paula Abdul
Walking On Sunshine – Katrina & The Waves
Born To Be Wild – Steppenwolf
Axel F – Harold Faltermeyer
All You Want – Dido
Black Dog – Led Zeppelin
Hollaback Girl – Gwen Stefani
When I’m President – Extreme
Back Off Bitch – Guns N’ Roses
Regret – New Order
For Those About To Rock (We Salute You) – AC-DC
Smokin’ In The Boys’ Room – Mötley Crüe
Clint Eastwood – Gorillaz
Tougher Than Leather – Run DMC
Freak On A Leash – Korn
It’s Oh So Quiet – Björk
Baby Seat – Barenaked Ladies
Bent – Matchbox 20
Fantastic Voyage – Coolio
Technologic – Daft Punk
Come Baby Come – K7
Song 2 – Blur
Partyman – Prince
Dizzy – Vic Reeves & The Wonderstuff
Another Brick In The Wall (Parts 1-3) – Korn
Blasphemous Rumours – Depeche Mode
Choose Life – PF Project
Asleep At The Wheel – The Bloodhound Gang
The Monkees (Theme From) – The Monkees
Wild, Wild West – The Escape Club
Supermassive Black Hole – Muse
Teardrop – Massive Attack
It’s My Life – Dr. Alban
All I Have To Do Is Dream – The Everly Brothers
Daft Punk Is Playing At My House – LCD Soundsystem
All Together Now – The Farm
Love Shack – The B-52’s
Maniac – Michael Sembello
Demolition Man – Def Leppard
Craig – Stephen Lynch
Somewhat Damaged – Nine Inch Nails
Bohemian Polka – Weird Al Yankovic
Rag Doll – Aerosmith
Crazy – Gnarls Barkley
Deuces Are Wild – Aerosmith
Rehab – Amy Winehouse
Rodeo – Garth Brooks
Burning Down The House – Talking Heads
Get Outta My Dreams, Get Into My Car – Billy Ocean
Manic Monday – Bangles
Justify My Love – Madonna
Intro – Apocalypse Please – Muse
Right Now – Van Halen
Our House – Madness
Dammit Janet – The Cast Of The Rocky Horror Picture Show
Vogue – Madonna
A Little Bit More – Jamie Lidell
Teenage Dirtbag – Wheatus
Five To One – The Doors
Back In The Saddle – Aerosmith
If I Ever Fall In Love (Original Acapella Version) – Shai
All Cartoons Are… – Family Guy Cast/Jason Alexander
Bad Boys – Wham!
It’s All About The Pentiums – Weird Al Yankovic
Better Man – Pearl Jam
Walk Of Life – Dire Straits
Crockett’s Theme – Jan Hammer
Always Something There To Remind Me – Naked Eyes
Crazy Little Thing Called Love – Queen
Turning Japanese – The Vapors
Black Betty – Ram Jam
Catch My Fall – Billy Idol
The Candy Man – Sammy Davis, Jr.
The Best Of What’s Around – Dave Matthews Band
Airline Amy – Weird Al Yankovic
Be-Bop-A-Lula – Paul McCartney
A Day In The Life – The Beatles
Billie Jean – Michael Jackson
Fool In The Rain – Led Zeppelin
Brian Wilson – Barenaked Ladies
Piggy – Nine Inch Nails
I’m A Believer – The Monkees
Bowling Song (Almighty Malachi, Professional Bowling God) – Stephen Lynch
Blitzkrieg Bop – The Ramones
Closing Time – Semisonic
Testing 1, 2, 3 – Barenaked Ladies
Life, In A Nutshell – Barenaked Ladies
You Look Marvelous – Billy Crystal
Can’t Stop This Thing We Started – Bryan Adams
Bad – Michael Jackson
Let’s Hear It For The Boy – Deniece Williams
Burning Heart – Survivor
Crazy – Seal
Can’t Get You Out Of My Head – Kylie Minogue
Beautiful – Elvis Costello
Anarchy In The U.K – Sex Pistols
E-Pro – Beck
Call And Answer – Barenaked Ladies
Place In The Country – Adam Ant
Blackened – Metallica
Because The Night – Patti Smith Group
All By Myself – Eric Carmen
I Live With It Every Day – Barenaked Ladies
Achy Breaky Heart – Billy Ray Cyrus
Wake Me Up Before You Go-Go – Wham!
Electrical Storm [William Orbit Mix] – U2
Aluminum – Barenaked Ladies
Come Together – Bobby McFerrin & Robin Williams
St. Elmo’s Fire (Man In Motion) – John Parr
Money, Money, Money – ABBA
All For You – Janet Jackson
The Rock Show – Blink-182
Goodbye To You – Scandal
Knights Of Cydonia – Muse
Any Way You Want It – Journey
Bust A Move – Young MC
Time Is Running Out – Muse
The More You Ignore Me… – Morrissey
Too Sick To Pray – A3
20 Dollar Nose Bleed – Fall Out Boy
Take A Chance On Me – Erasure
Bette Davis Eyes – Kim Carnes
Don’t Be Cruel – Elvis Presley
Dream On – Aerosmith
Maybe Katie – Barenaked Ladies
Close My Eyes Forever – Lita Ford
American Honky-Tonk Bar Association – Garth Brooks
Grey Street – Dave Matthews & Tim Reynolds
Bad Days – The Flaming Lips
Condemnation – Depeche Mode
(Can’t Live Without Your) Love and Affection – Nelson
Bye Bye Bye – *N Sync
Born On The Bayou – Creedence Clearwater Revival
I’ll Be Loving You (Forever) – New Kids On The Block
Blind Man – Aerosmith
Wild Side – Mötley Crüe
Baby Come Back – Player
Exit – U2
Callin’ Baton rouge – Garth Brooks
Drive In, Drive Out – Dave Matthews Band
Killing Me Softly With His Song – Fugees
Sweet Child O’ Mine – Guns N’ Roses
Are You Gonna Be My Girl – Jet
Ringfinger – Nine Inch Nails
The Only Time – Nine Inch Nails
That’s What I Get – Nine Inch Nails
Sin – Nine Inch Nails
Kinda I Want To – Nine Inch Nails
Something I Can Never Have – Nine Inch Nails
Sanctified – Nine Inch Nails
Down In It – Nine Inch Nails
Terrible Lie – Nine Inch Nails
Head Like A Hole – Nine Inch Nails
Two Of A Kind, Workin’ On A Full House – Garth Brooks
Bad Company – Bad Company
Cast Your Fate To The Wind – Vince Guaraldi
Papa Don’t Preach – Madonna
Lay Lady Lay – Ministry
Baby Love – The Supremes
Smooth Criminal – Alien Ant Farm
Crosstown Traffic – Jimi Hendrix
All 4 Love – Color Me Badd
Stuck With You – Huey Lewis & The News
Detachable Penis – King Missile
Girls On Film – Duran Duran
It’s Time To Party – Andrew WK
Ain’t That A Kick In The Head – Dean Martin
Don’t Stop Me Now – Queen
Beautiful Day – U2
Can’t Get Enough Of You Baby – Smash Mouth
Girls, Girls, Girls – Mötley Crüe
Every Breath You Take – The Police
Cupid – Sam Cooke
Do You Believe In Magic? – Lovin’ Spoonful
Daughter – Pearl Jam
All I Wanna Do – Sheryl Crow
Sweet Dreams (Are Made of This) – Marilyn Manson
Superman (It’s Not Easy) – Five For Fighting
Unbelievable – EMF
Unfinished – Barenaked Ladies
Silent Lucidity – Queensryche
Battery – Metallica
Be Aggressive – Faith No More
Holden On Affleck – The Cast Of Jay And Silent Bob Strike Back
Cosmic Girl – Jamiroquai
Intergalactic – Beastie Boys
Carnival – Natalie Merchant
I’ll Stop the World and Melt W – Modern English
867-5309/Jenny – Tommy Tutone
Don’t Lose My Number – Phil Collins
All I Really Want – Alanis Morissette
My Friend Of Misery – Metallica
Millennium – Robbie Williams
Don’t You (Forget About Me) – Simple Minds
Cruel Summer – Bananarama
Express Yourself – Madonna
Don’t You Want Me – Human League
Don’t Worry Be Happy – Bobby McFerrin
Diablo Rojo – Rodrigo y Gabriela
Master Of Puppets – Metallica
Vertigo – U2
You Learn – Alanis Morissette
Bullet The Blue Sky – U2
Afternoons And Coffeespoons – Crash Test Dummies
Circle Jerk – Aerosmith
Joy To The World – Three Dog Night
Another Body Murdered – Faith No More
The Dope Show – Marilyn Manson
A – Barenaked Ladies
Jacob’s Ladder [Single Remix] – Huey Lewis & The News
Material Girl – Madonna
Merry F#%$in’ Christmas – Denis Leary
You’re Gonna Miss Me – 13th Floor Elevators
Right Through You – Alanis Morissette
Endlessly – Muse
It’s Tricky – The Bloodhound Gang
Devil’s Dance – Metallica
Bang On! – Propellerheads
Cumbersome – Seven Mary Three
No More Mr. Nice Guy – Alice Cooper
Damn I Wish I Was Your Lover – Sophie B. Hawkins
99 Luftballons – Nena
The Final Countdown – Europe
At The Club (Club MTV Theme) – Joe Boys
Don’t Stand So Close To Me – The Police
Only Happy When It Rains – Garbage
Top Of The World – Van Halen
Back On The Chain Gang – The Pretenders
Killer – Adamski
Gimme Gimme Gimme – ABBA
It Takes Two – Rob Base & DJ E-Z Rock
In Da Club – 50 Cent
They Don’t Know – Tracey Ullman
Lemon Tree – Fool’s Garden
Capital G – Nine Inch Nails
All The Young Dudes – Mott The Hoople
Ain’t It The Life – Foo Fighters
You Oughta Know – Alanis Morissette
Come To My Window – Melissa Etheridge
Again – Lenny Kravitz
Crocodile Rock – Elton John
Barely Breathing – Duncan Sheik
Da Doo Ron Ron (When He Walked Me Home) – The Crystals
Venus – Bananarama
(Can’t Get My) Head Around You – Offspring
We Built This City – Starship
Top O’ The Morning To Ya – House Of Pain
Devil With A Blue Dress On/ Good Golly Miss Molly – Mitch Ryder & The Detroit Wheels
Shattered Dreams – Johnny Hates Jazz
Do Ya – Ace Frehley
Grade 9 – Barenaked Ladies
The Anthem – Good Charlotte
Ain’t Nobody – Rufus & Chaka Khan
Daddy’s Gonna Pay For Your Crashed Car – U2
All Shook Up – Elvis Presley
Karma Police – Radiohead
Dammit – Blink-182
Tainted Love – Marilyn Manson
Bullet With Butterfly Wings – Smashing Pumpkins
Something About You – Level 42
Devil Inside – INXS
Mope – The Bloodhound Gang
Easy – Barenaked Ladies
Loneliness – Tomcraft
Don’t Bring Me Down – Electric Light Orchestra
These Apples – Barenaked Ladies
Over The Hills And Far Away – Led Zeppelin
Brother Love’s Traveling Salvation Show – Neil Diamond
If You Leave – Orchestral Manoeuvres In The Dark
Discothèque – U2
Ain’t Nothing Like The Real Thing – Marvin Gaye
Don’t Download This Song – Weird Al Yankovic
I Don’t Care – Fall Out Boy
Black Horse & The Cherry Tree – KT Tunstall
Pride (In The Name Of Love) – U2
Let My Love Open The Door – Pete Townshend
Der Kommissar – After The Fire
She’s On Time – Barenaked Ladies
Born In The USA – Bruce Springsteen
Bad Medicine – Bon Jovi
Somewhere Only We Know – Keane
Best Of You – Foo Fighters
Stray Cat Strut – Stray Cats
Here I Go Again – Whitesnake
Somebody To Love – George Michael
(Anesthesia) Pulling Teeth – Metallica
The Way – Fastball
Centerfold – J. Geils Band
Everyday – Dave Matthews Band
Club Tropicana – Wham!
Doing It All For My Baby – Huey Lewis & The News
All Over The World – Electric Light Orchestra
Blue Morning, Blue Day – Foreigner
Like A Virgin – Madonna
Domino – Van Morrison
Pour Some Sugar On Me – Def Leppard
Blue Suede Shoes – Elvis Presley
Electric Avenue – Eddy Grant
Peterborough And The Kawarthas – Barenaked Ladies
Jam – Michael Jackson
Crawling – Linkin Park
Footloose – Kenny Loggins
Jack & Diane – John Cougar
Canadian Idiot – Weird Al Yankovic
Back 2 Good – Matchbox 20
Baby I Need Your Loving – The Four Tops
Stockholm Syndrome – Muse
Who Made Who – AC-DC
Stomach Vs. Heart – Barenaked Ladies
And We Danced – Hooters
Desire – U2
Africa – Toto
Feel Good Inc. – Gorillaz
Boost Me – Trevor Rabin
Crimson And Clover – Tommy James & The Shondells
You Sexy Thing – Deee-Lite
Dante’s Lament – Clerks Dialogue
Aeroplane – Red Hot Chili Peppers
Everybody Have Fun Tonight – Wang Chung
Rock DJ – Robbie Williams
Crazy – Aerosmith
Don’t Drink The Water – Dave Matthews Band
Higher Ground – Red Hot Chili Peppers
Dazed And Confused – Led Zeppelin
Cry – Godley & Creme
Big Bang Theory Theme – Barenaked Ladies
The Man Who Sold The World – Nirvana
Miami Vice Theme – Jan Hammer
Build Me Up Buttercup – The Foundations
Be My Yoko Ono – Barenaked Ladies
Root Down – Beastie Boys
Armageddon It – Def Leppard
Rock Lobster – The B-52’s
Battleship Chains – Georgia Satellites
Cherry Bomb – John Cougar Mellencamp
Only Wanna Be With You – Hootie & The Blowfish
Batdance – Prince
Sex & Candy – Marcy Playground
Day Tripper – The Beatles
Stuck With You – Huey Lewis & The News
Communication Breakdown – Led Zeppelin
Ain’t Too Proud To Beg – Temptations
Free Fallin’ – Tom Petty
Party Til You Puke – Andrew WK
Lucky Star – Madonna
Ain’t No Love (Ain’t No Use) – Melanie Williams
Take My Breath Away – Berlin
Afternoon Delight – Starland Vocal Band
The Biggest Ball Of Twine In Minnesota – Weird Al Yankovic
Take Five – Rodrigo y Gabriela
Requiem – Foo Fighters
Drive Me Wild – Foo Fighters
No Diggity – Klaxons
Under Pressure – Keane
Suck My Kiss – Red Hot Chili Peppers
What’s The Frequency, Kenneth? – REM
Under Pressure – Queen
Acrobat – U2
The Loved One – INXS
The Day The World Went Away – Nine Inch Nails
Total Eclipse Of The Heart – Bonnie Tyler
The Call Of Ktulu – Metallica
Poker Face – Lady GaGa
American Girl – Tom Petty & The Heartbreakers
Wanted Dead Or Alive – Bon Jovi
West End Girls [Sasha Mix] – Pet Shop Boys
Back In Time – Huey Lewis & The News
The Cover Of The “Rolling Stone” – Dr. Hook
Down On The Corner – Creedence Clearwater Revival
Danger Zone – Kenny Loggins
Jeremy – Pearl Jam
The Heat Is On – Glenn Frey
Oh Sheila – Ready For The World
Poison Arrow – ABC
Hold On To The Nights – Richard Marx
Play With Me – Extreme
At Last – Etta James
Whip It – Devo
Come With Me – Puff Daddy
Dance With Me – Orleans
Cat’s In The Cradle – Harry Chapin
Don’t Come Around Here No More – Tom Petty & The Heartbreakers
Anything Goes – Guns N’ Roses
Heartbeat – Don Johnson
The Boys Of Summer – Don Henley
Take A Picture – Filter
Breakfast In America – Supertramp
Round Here – Counting Crows
The Hands That Built America – U2
All Because Of You – U2
Ballroom Blitz – Sweet
The Time Warp – Damian
Union Of The Snake – Duran Duran
Can You Forgive Her? – Pet Shop Boys
Creep – TLC
Physical (You’re So) – Adam Ant
Brown Eyed Girl – Everclear
Rollin’ & Scratchin’ – Daft Punk
When I Come Around – Green Day
Hymn – Moby
316 – Van Halen
Couch Potato – Weird Al Yankovic
What Have You Done For Me Lately – Janet Jackson
Viva la Vida – Coldplay
Personal Jesus – Marilyn Manson
Adam’s Song – Blink-182
B.I.N.G.O. – The Movement
Come On Eileen – Save Ferris
Love Me Two Times – The Doors
Ready To Die – Andrew WK
Apache – Michael Viner’s Incredible Bongo Band
Fly – Sugar Ray
Blue Monday – Orgy
Beat It [Moby’s Sub Mix] – Michael Jackson
Lie In Our Graves – Dave Matthews & Tim Reynolds
Doop – Doop
Discothèque [New Mix] – U2
Being for the Benefit of Mr. Kite – Billy Connolly
Time Warp – The Cast Of The Rocky Horror Picture Show
Somewhere I Belong – Linkin Park
Antichrist Superstar – Marilyn Manson
Bring Back My Happiness – Moby
Birthday – The Beatles
Touch It / Technologic – Daft Punk
Carmina Burana (Introduction) – Atlanta Symphony Orchestra
Killing Loneliness – HIM
One Week – Barenaked Ladies
Jerk It Out – Caesars
King Nothing – Metallica
Oh Yeah – Yello
Lying From You – Linkin Park
Angry White Boy Polka – Weird Al Yankovic
57 Channels (And Nothin’ On) – Bruce Springsteen
Three MC’s And One DJ – Beastie Boys
Clocks – Coldplay
American Dream – L.A. Style
Highway To Hell – AC-DC
Bad Habit – Offspring
Wonderful – Everclear
Sabotage – Beastie Boys
Mr. Jones – Counting Crows
Come To Butt-Head – Beavis & Butt-Head
A.D.I.D.A.S. – Korn
Feeling So Real – Moby
Race Car Ya-Yas – Cake
War On Drugs – Barenaked Ladies
Be Young, Be Foolish, Be Happy – The Tams
Axel F – Crazy Frog
Gone [New Mix] – U2
Amnesia – Chumbawamba
Ain’t No Sunshine – Bill Withers
Shout – Tears For Fears
Chewbacca – Supernova
Body Movin’ – Beastie Boys
Hysteria – Muse
Far Behind – Candlebox
Take Off – Bob & Doug McKenzie
Starfuckers, Inc. – Nine Inch Nails
No Limit – 2 Unlimited
Crazy For You – Madonna
The Power – Snap!
Jump – Van Halen
Da Funk / Dadftendirekt – Daft Punk
Numb – Linkin Park
Social – Squirtgun
Naked Girl Falling Down The Stairs – The Cramps
London Calling – The Clash
We Built This City – Starship
Particle Man – They Might Be Giants
Fortunate Son – Creedence Clearwater Revival
Around The World – Daft Punk
Don’t Pull Your Love – Hamilton, Joe Frank & Reynolds
New Age Girl – Deadeye Dick
… Baby One More Time – Britney Spears
Best Of You – Foo Fighters
We’re Not Gonna Take It – Twisted Sister
Alternative Girlfriend – Barenaked Ladies
Uninvited – Alanis Morissette
Don’t Stop Living In The Red – Andrew WK
Brown Eyed Girl – Van Morrison
Candy Girl – New Edition
Blind – Korn
Ain’t Talkin’ ‘Bout Love – Van Halen
Damage, Inc. – Metallica
Alfred Hitchcock Presents – Unknown Artist
Longview – Green Day
Blue – Wham!
#1 Crush – Garbage
Every Rose Has Its Thorn – Poison
A View To A Kill – Duran Duran
The Captain Of Her Heart – Double
Never Tear Us Apart – INXS
Moneytalks – AC-DC
At This Moment – Billy Vera & The Beaters
Eraser (Polite) – Nine Inch Nails
Don’t Wanna Fall In Love – Jane Child
I Want Candy – Bow Wow Wow
MMM, MMM, MMM, MMM – Crash Test Dummies
Set Adrift On Memory Bliss – P.M. Dawn
Mistress For Christmas – AC-DC
Run-Around – Blues Traveler
In A Big Country – Big Country
Brandy (You’re A Fine Girl) – Looking Glass
All My Life – K-Ci & JoJo
Let’s Hang On – Frankie Valli & The Four Seasons
I’m Too Sexy – Right Said Fred
Blooze – Junkyard
Don’t Mean Nothing – Richard Marx
Angel Of Harlem – U2
Umbrella (feat. Jay-Z) – Rihanna
Crazy Train – Ozzy Osbourne
Back On My Feet Again – Babys
Down Under – Men At Work
Dude (Looks Like A Lady) – Aerosmith
I Think I Can Beat Mike Tyson – DJ Jazzy Jeff & The Fresh Prince
Mambo No. 5 (A Little Bit Of…) – Lou Bega
A Day in the Life – Jeff Beck
C’mon N’ Ride It (The Train) – Quad City DJ’s
Break Your Heart – Barenaked Ladies
Lady Madonna – The Beatles
I Can’t Go For That – Hall & Oates
Take On Me – A-Ha
Heaven – Bryan Adams
Break Your Heart – Barenaked Ladies
Crush With Eyeliner – REM
Alternative Polka – Weird Al Yankovic
China Grove – The Doobie Brothers
I Still Haven’t Found What I’m Looking For – U2
Jay’s Rap 2001 – Jason Mewes
Monkey Wrench – Foo Fighters
December, 1963 (Oh, What A Night) – Four Seasons
Beds Are Burning – Midnight Oil
Beat It – Michael Jackson
White & Nerdy – Weird Al Yankovic
Commercial 2 – House Of Pain
Numb [New Mix] – U2
Taste Of India – Aerosmith
Are You Gonna Go My Way – Lenny Kravitz
But It’s Alright – Huey Lewis & The News
Bawitdaba – Kid Rock
A Beautiful Morning – Rascals
Mope [The Swamp Remix] – The Bloodhound Gang
Hero Of The Day – Metallica
Daydream Believer – The Monkees
My Hero – Foo Fighters
Right Here Right Now – Fatboy Slim
Why Can’t We Be Friends – Smash Mouth
Wham Rap! (Enjoy What You Do) – Wham!
Boulevard Of Broken Dreams – Green Day
Hand In My Pocket – Alanis Morissette
Who Am I (What’s My Name)? – Snoop Doggy Dogg
Perfect World – Huey Lewis & The News
Addicted To Spuds – Weird Al Yankovic
Baker Street – Foo Fighters
Good Stuff – The B-52’s
C30, C60, C90, Go! – Bow Wow Wow
Life, In A Nutshell – Barenaked Ladies
Izzo / In The End – Linkin Park
Brilliant Disguise – Bruce Springsteen
Tones Of Home – Blind Melon
Double Talkin’ Jive – Guns N’ Roses
Believe – Cher
Bang A Gong (Get It On) – T. Rex
Rhythm Of The Night – DeBarge
One – Metallica
Ain’t No Fun (If The Homies Can’t Have None) – Snoop Doggy Dogg
Cannonball – Breeders
Straight Up – Paula Abdul
Bitch – Meredith Brooks
Second Best – Barenaked Ladies
Something In The Air – Tom Petty & The Heartbreakers
Tom’s Diner – DNA
Don’t Do Me Like That – Tom Petty & The Heartbreakers
Brass Monkey – Beastie Boys
Cruisin’ [Edit] – Huey Lewis & The News
Body Language – Queen
All I Need Is A Miracle – Mike + The Mechanics
Dirt Off Your Shoulder / Lying From You – Linkin Park
This Is Halloween – Marilyn Manson
Return To Innocence – Enigma
James Bond Theme [Moby’s Re-Version] – Moby
Babe I’m Gonna Leave You – Led Zeppelin
Until The End Of The World – U2
What It Takes – Aerosmith
Idiots Vs. The Internet – The Cast Of Jay And Silent Bob Strike Back
The Old Apartment – Barenaked Ladies
Blister In The Sun – Violent Femmes
Love And Peace Or Else – U2
Flavor Of The Weak – American Hi-Fi
Me And Mrs. Jones – Billy Paul
You – Candlebox
The Beautiful People – Marilyn Manson
This Is Halloween – Panic! At The Disco
St. Elmo’s Fire (Man In Motion) – John Parr
Hot In Herre – Jake Shears
Bouncing Around the Room – Phish
Another Postcard – Barenaked Ladies
I Know What I Like – Huey Lewis & The News
Der Kommissar – After The Fire
Word Up – Cameo
AM Radio – Everclear
Eye Of The Tiger – Survivor
C’mon, C’mon – Sheryl Crow
Alive – Pearl Jam
Dr. Feelgood – Mötley Crüe
Take It Back – Barenaked Ladies
Anyone Else But You – The Moldy Peaches
Everybody’s Changing – Keane
We’re Not Gonna Take It – Twisted Sister
Trip Through Your Wires – U2
Stone Cold Crazy – Metallica
Along Comes Mary – The Bloodhound Gang
Cover Me – Candlebox
Slam – Onyx
Numb/Encore – Linkin Park
Turn It Up / Fire It Up [Remix] – Busta Rhymes
Hurt – Johnny Cash
Fly Away – Lenny Kravitz
Working For The Weekend – Loverboy
Brian Wilson – Barenaked Ladies
Tootin’ On The Hooters – Doctor Dre & Ed Lover
Dead – They Might Be Giants
Stay Or Leave – Dave Matthews & Tim Reynolds
Hells Bells – AC-DC
Come Sail Away – Styx
The Power Of Love – Huey Lewis & The News
Da Funk – Daft Punk
How Will I Know – Whitney Houston
Last Train To Clarksville – The Monkees
Mr. Roboto – Styx
Back To The Rocking Horse – Poison
I Disappear – Metallica
Black – Pearl Jam
Stay – Shakespeare’s Sister
Beside You In Time – Nine Inch Nails
Hook – Blues Traveler
Walk This Way – Aerosmith w/Run DMC
My Lovin (You’re Never Gonna Get It) – En Vogue
The Reflex – Duran Duran
Classical Gas – Mason Williams
No Rain – Blind Melon
Ain’t That A Shame – Fats Domino
Do You Really Want To Hurt Me – Culture Club
At My Most Beautiful – REM
Love Is A Battlefield – Pat Benatar
Baby, It’s Cold Outside – Leon Redbone
Fight The Power – Public Enemy
Born To Run – Melissa Etheridge
Teenage Dirtbag [Clean Album Version] – Wheatus
All My Love – Led Zeppelin
Need You Tonight/Mediate – INXS
Ghostbusters – Ray Parker Jr.
Let’s Hear It For Nine Inch Nails – Nine Inch Nails
Hey Beautiful (Theme from “How I Met Your Mother”) – The Solids
Party Hard – Andrew WK
Fly Like An Eagle – Seal
Sunday Bloody Sunday – U2
Magic Carpet Ride – Steppenwolf
Cherish – Madonna
Bang The Drum All Day – Todd Rundgren
Bank Job – Barenaked Ladies
Baby You’re A Rich Man – The Beatles
These Apples – Barenaked Ladies
Karma Chameleon – Culture Club
Electric Avenue [Ringbang Remix] – Eddy Grant
Even Better Than The Real Thing – U2
Waterloo – ABBA
The Boys Are Back In Town – Thin Lizzy
Wild Life – INXS
Dirty Water – Standells
Violet – Hole
Time Is Running Out – Muse
Across The Universe – The Beatles
Wishing Well – Terence Trent D’Arby
Another Round – Foo Fighters
Barbie Girl – Aqua
Canary In A Coalmine – The Police
…And Justice For All – Metallica
All Night Long – Joe Walsh
Do They Know It’s Christmas? – Barenaked Ladies
The Distance – Cake
DOA – Foo Fighters
You Dropped A Bomb On Me – The Gap Band
Road Rage [Live] – Catatonia
I Get Wet – Andrew WK
I’m Afraid Of Americans [V1] – David Bowie
Baba O’Reilly – Who
Round And Round – Ratt
I Like To Move It – Reel 2 Real
DARE – Gorillaz
Gave Up – Nine Inch Nails
Dancing Queen – ABBA
Thank U – Alanis Morissette
N.F.B. (Dallabnikufesin) – Anthrax
Blinded By The Light – Manfred Mann’s Earth Band
SOS – ABBA
Just The Two Of Us – Grover Washington Jr. & Bill Withers
Workin’ For A Livin’ – Huey Lewis & The News
Call Me – Blondie
Just A Man – Faith No More
Green Suede Shoes – Black 47
One – U2
Love Is Blindness – U2
Human Video Game – DJ Jazzy Jeff & The Fresh Prince
Fly Away – Lenny Kravitz
Chain Of Fools – Aretha Franklin
Alive – POD
Fight For Your Right (To Party) – Beastie Boys
Thank You – Dido
The Muppet Show Theme – The Muppets
Angie – Rolling Stones
Every Time You Go Away – Paul Young
Bang Your Head (Metal Health) – Quiet Riot
Beatiful People – Rusted Root
Hit ‘Em Wit Da Hee [Remix] – Missy Elliott
Bad – U2
What I Like About You – The Romantics
Kyrie – Mr. Mister
Jessie’s Girl – Rick Springfield
When Doves Cry – Prince & The Revolution
Shout – Tears For Fears
Blue Monday – New Order
Broken Wings – Mr. Mister
Adagio For Strings – Tiesto

…Where The Deer & The Antelope Play!

After spending 50% of our obligatory stays to get a free night at one of the many hotels that are part of the Choice Hotels network, we set off this morning in fog that put visibility at about a 1/4 mile. That didn’t stop anyone, us included, in barrelling down Route 90/94 at 75 MPH. There’s nothing to really do in North Dakota/Montana but drive fast on straight roads. But wait, there’s more!

If you’re in the market for livestock, North Dakota is where you want to be. A virtual MegaMart of animal flesh is available for whatever your fancy may be. You can buy ducks, horses, buffalo, llama, cows, and night crawlers (they do love their hunting/fishing out here, even at Dairy Queen!). Land can be yours to house your menagerie for as little as $1 a sq. ft.

The elevation didn’t change much until we got closer to Montana. Which was hell on my clogged sinuses. It really is “God’s Country”, complete with Anti-Abortion and Say No To Meth billboards, a lot of sprawling landscapes and nature as far as the eye can see. We arrived in Billings, MT not knowing what to expect. The place is teeming with activity. Everything from the Wal-Mart SuperCenter to the 10 Minute Lube Hut (translation: Oil Change).

We decided to save a few bucks and pick up some things for dinner at the Wal-Mart SuperCenter. Whilst we were looking for some Vicks to unclog my plumbing, we got a call from Manny, the driver for the moving company. He said that he was waiting for us in Seattle. Our stuff beat us there! Funny thing is I don’t remember being passed by an Isaac’s Moving truck.

The nice thing is that we’ll be able to get all our stuff into the apartment and, theoretically, unpacked by the end of the weekend.

–Tim & Jamie (Billings, MT)

The Biggest Ball Of Twine in Minnesota!

We had heard about a mythical Twine Ball in a Weird Al Yankovic song and believe it or not, it actually exists! After spending a wonderful weekend with Michael, David, Wally, Lee Lee, Buddy & Sampson…we decided that we had driven more than 1,700 miles, we weren’t going to let a 65 mile “detour” stop us from seeing The Biggest Ball of Twine in all of it’s glory.

 



It weighs 17,400 pounds, is twelve feet in diameter, and was the creation of Francis A. Johnson. He started wrapping it in March of 1950 — four hours a day, every day. Francis lifted it with a crane to continue proper wrapping. For 39 years, this magnificent sphere evolved at Johnson’s farm, and eventually moved to a circular open air shed on his front lawn.
–Tim & Jamie (Darwin, MN)